Next steps

Well, Friday SHOULD be my D&C, but I’m waiting for a call tomorrow to confirm. I have to get a rhogam shot because my blood is O-.. this is the first I’m hearing about it that pertains to me. I’m also going to be doing some additional testing after my hCg levels return to negative.

I’ve decided to take a break after this. I am hoping to get one more retrieval in before the year ends as I will be changing insurances so we’ll have more than two more attempts left. I wish they didn’t count frozen transfers as a cycle, I still think that’s bogus, but I have to remember I’m lucky and a lot of people pay out of pocket for it all. I won’t be able to do a transfer until February probably, because of wedding photography schedules. Who knows what I will end up doing. I know this break is good for me, but another part of me wants this so bad I want to continue and to not waste any time.

I had ordered a fitbit, some new sneakers, and wireless headphones Monday night. I’ve put on 20 pounds since I started the IVF portion of our TTC journey and was overweight before that, so I’m looking to lose 30-40 pounds. I’m going to focus on getting fit and healthy again for the time being.

I’ve silenced most of my IVF support groups on FB so I don’t have to read about anything, and I left the pregnancy groups. I don’t know how active I’ll be around here, but I’ll try my best to keep up with you all. I’m sure I’ll be posting after my D&C and such, but after that I might lay off.

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Vacation cut short, staycation until Monday

I had a great time on my vacation! Swimming, kayaking, an orchestra show (which had a gnarly thunderstorm in the middle of it!) and I read 3 books!

Adam had to come home on Tuesday. I thought I would stay until Thursday but this morning I was missing him and wanted to come home earlier than that. So this morning I left at 10:30 and made my way back home. On my way home I called the fertility center and changed my blood work to tomorrow morning (yay!) and I called and ordered some more progesterone, as well as made an acupuncture appointment for tomorrow.

The whole time on vacation I had cramping (very mild) on and off, and I was SO tired. Nausea here and there. My boobs are still hurting on and off as well. I freaked out my second night there and bought some pregnancy tests. My digital test said “YES+” and it calmed me down, I still haven’t taken the second test. Today I’m 5 weeks and 3 days pregnant, and that was the point where I lost my last pregnancy. I’m nervous but feel mostly calm. I think being away from google and support groups really helped calm me down.

I’ve been having really vivid dreams lately, and in one of them I had quadruplets. AHH!

I’m excited and scared for tomorrow’s blood work. Let’s hope this goes well!!

2nd beta=447 – yess!

I’m so happy! My beta was 447 today. “A great rise!”

I looked it up and

Doubling Time (Hours): 46.04

the normal doubling time is between 31 and 72 hours.

My next beta is a week from today, but I’ll be 2 hours away on vacation, so I’m going to call them and ask what I should do. Hopefully there is a place out there I can get blood drawn!

I’m relieved but still nervous!! Woo!

 

edit- I talked to my care team- they scheduled my next beta for next Saturday- OOF. That’s a week and 4 days. Maybe I should have just left vacation to do the beta… Yikes! They said it didn’t matter when I did it. Not to them! lol 🙂 Hopefully I can relax on my trip!

Beta #2 drawn, now the wait

I had my second beta drawn this morning, now we wait.

I feel very tired, nauseous, my boobs hurt (different than last time but they still hurt!) and I’ve been having cramping for days on days, which makes me feel reassured that the embie/embies are still in momma ❤

I wish I could take the day off and go to bed but I have vacation next week, so no time to spare!

Last night at therapy I told my therapist that I felt psycho, but after some questions she said it sounds like I’m handling things well. I’m still functioning in life and I’m doing self care. There’s nothing else I can do. I have a lengthy past of anxiety and depression and I know that I am handling everything like I should be, but on the inside I still feel crazy.

Can’t wait to hear my numbers.

Beta= 217 – I am pregnant!

Woooohoo!

My beta came in. 217. I am pregnant 🙂
Dr. P says that’s a great first number and of course I’ll go back in two days to make sure it’s doubling. She says we should remain cautiously optimistic but she’s very happy with that number! Hubs is not excited because he’s scared from last time, but thinks once we get passed where we were last time that will increase. I’m excited but also cautious. Great start to my week!

10dp5dt

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Gang’s all here!

I had my beta drawn this morning. Now the long wait until around lunch time when I hear the official word. I feel like I’m in good shape. We shall see!

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So before yesterday’s wedding I went to buy some more HPTs for this morning and tomorrow morning. They were out of First response early response, so what you’re seeing is First response rapid response (on the left) and a CVS version of an early response on the right. I was worried if I only got the rapid response the line might be too light and I’d freak out, so I bought an early response to make myself feel better. YES I AM DEEP IN PSYCHOSIS. This will hopefully be settled tomorrow when I get my beta. AND A GOOD BETA AT THAT! The lines are stronger than my last pregnancy so I am thinking I’m in good shape. We’ll see tomorrow!

9dp5dt

HCG= 19

I just got today’s blood work back. My HCG is at 19. I have to go back again on Monday to get my blood drawn again. I want to know exactly what happened and where I go from here, but I guess my HCG levels have to completely diminish first. I don’t know when I’ll be speaking to Dr. P again, I wonder if I should call and ask.

I’m having cramping and light bleeding today.

Work has been hard, I don’t like pretending I’m okay when I’m really not. I think this weekend’s wedding madness took away all my reserves to do so.

Update- They aren’t sure what this was yet. I have a follow up with Dr. Plante on Tuesday of next week. It sounds like a chemical to me, from all my research and other ladies experiences, but I won’t know for sure until I meet with Dr. P.

Ultrasound in the morning, and blood work

Dr. P called back and we chatted about what was going on. She said that sometimes progesterone can give you bad pains that feel like the REALLY bad pains. She also said it’s too early to be symptomatic for a tubal pregnancy, but she wants to do an ultrasound just in case, and to see what’s going on in there. I had some spotting that was maroonish mixed with brown but I’m back to brown again. It might be too early to see anything on the ultrasound. It’s normal to have spotting as long as it’s not bright red, so I’m trying to remain calm. I’m also getting my beta that was scheduled for Friday tomorrow morning. Adam is coming with me. It’s going to be in the far away satellite, so I had to tell work I wouldn’t be in until 10 am-ish. Also, no sexy times. I’m fine with that, not quite in the mood at this time.. haha.

So that’s the scoop. I’m sorry for the ladies who aren’t pregnant yet to be reading this. I feel like I sound crazy! I just didn’t expect any of this and the pains were so bad.