Ultrasound 9/1

I finally got my orders close to 4. Can you imagine if I hadn’t called? I CANNOT. My ultrasound will be with Dr. W on 9/1 at 8:45 am. Though I’m sad it’s two weeks away- TWO WEEKS!- since I’m on vacation I’m going to need that time to build up a few hours in my bank to be able to make the appointment. No earlier appointment for me! I was also told to take 2mg of Estrace just once a day now instead of twice, which is great! I’m looking forward to the time when I can stop my progesterone shots and the placenta takes over. My injection sites are SORE.

Acupuncture was NOT relaxing. The woman next to me was snoring the entire time. It gave me a headache, I just wanted to get out of there. I visited with my mom afterward then came home and lounged around. I went to bed after my shot at 8 pm and I’ve been up since 1ish when Adam went to bed.

Vacation has been great for dealing with my pregnancy tiredness- I am not looking forward to going back to work.

TWO WEEKS. I got this. For now…. haha :X


After calling 5 times and not getting a care team member, I left a message for them saying I was going a little crazy and I would love to know the outcome of my blood test. My hCG came back at 7,611. WHAT?! I hung up with the nurse and starting crying immediately. I can’t believe it. She said the reason they hadn’t sent me orders was because Dr. P hadn’t reviewed it yet but once she does I’ll get orders in the portal for my ultrasound. I’m crying again. Oh my god.

I have acupuncture tonight. I’m in shock right now!!

Vacation cut short, staycation until Monday

I had a great time on my vacation! Swimming, kayaking, an orchestra show (which had a gnarly thunderstorm in the middle of it!) and I read 3 books!

Adam had to come home on Tuesday. I thought I would stay until Thursday but this morning I was missing him and wanted to come home earlier than that. So this morning I left at 10:30 and made my way back home. On my way home I called the fertility center and changed my blood work to tomorrow morning (yay!) and I called and ordered some more progesterone, as well as made an acupuncture appointment for tomorrow.

The whole time on vacation I had cramping (very mild) on and off, and I was SO tired. Nausea here and there. My boobs are still hurting on and off as well. I freaked out my second night there and bought some pregnancy tests. My digital test said “YES+” and it calmed me down, I still haven’t taken the second test. Today I’m 5 weeks and 3 days pregnant, and that was the point where I lost my last pregnancy. I’m nervous but feel mostly calm. I think being away from google and support groups really helped calm me down.

I’ve been having really vivid dreams lately, and in one of them I had quadruplets. AHH!

I’m excited and scared for tomorrow’s blood work. Let’s hope this goes well!!

Gentle restorative yoga? More like yoga naps.

Last night I had a client meeting at my studio. We were designing her boudoir album. The yoga studio I attend is right down the street, so after she left I started working on a blog post. I’m so behind blogging my business stuff. After I chose the images I wanted, I set them to convert to JPGs and laid down on my chaise lounge chair. I fell asleep listening to The Get Up Kids and woke up 40ish minutes later, finished up my stuff on the computer, and got ready for yoga.

I got to yoga and L and I talked about my pregnancy and she is currently in the (natural) tww. She has symptoms but doesn’t want to believe them just yet. Class started with 10-15 minutes of meditation. I set my intentions for my embryo/embies and had my hands on my stomach, just talking to them inwardly. After all our sitting poses with started using the pillow things and blankets and I swear it was just me basically napping in different gentle poses. During savasana I was asleep, for sure.

I’m used to going hard in yoga, a heated class at that, so getting used to this non heated class has been weird. I was walking standing up a little straighter on my way into work, so it has it’s benefits.

In the night I woke up with strong cramps, but they are gone now. My head feels heavy and hurts, and my nausea is coming and going. I’m still very tired.

I’m just hoping and hoping this is it for me. Adam is starting to even talk about there being a baby or babies in me, so he’s letting his guard down a little.

I have acupuncture tonight! Looking forward to it. Probably going to sleep through that, too- ha!

Two days until vacation!


I had my 4dp5dt acupuncture session last night. Last night I had that stabby achey feeling in what feels like my cervix, like I’ve had my last two transfers on day 4. I was excited but Adam told me not to get too excited. This morning I woke up with mild cramps, but other than that, I feel nothing. My St. Gerard bracelet broke over night and the little charm was stuck right where I get my injections. I fixed it this morning and am wearing it again.

I just feel crazy. I hope this works. Please let this be the one.

PUPO= pregnant until proven otherwise

Last night I had acupuncture. I saw one of my best friends – we’ve been friends since childhood- getting acupuncture as well! I tapped her arm as I passed by and we excitedly waved at each other. She ended up waiting for me afterward and we went out to eat. I got a St. Germain Mimosa as I’m hoping that was the last drink I’ll have until I’m a mom! My friend L had a miscarriage several months ago, and after her D&C and waiting period she has started trying again. She hasn’t gone the infertility route as of yet, as she became preg3.pngnant fairly quickly when she started trying, but it’s very hard for her after her M/C of course. While I was laying in my acupuncture chair I started to tear up (thanks hormone) thinking about how we used to have sleep overs all the time and watch sappy movies and we did so much together- now here we are decades later (that makes me feel old) trying to have babies and having issues. I told her I thought it was great luck that she was there that night and maybe she’ll bring me some luck or my transfer…. so!

As of this morning, y transfer is in the bank! (Did I just compare my vagina/uterus to a bank?)

As I previously mentioned, my mom came along. Though I’m not religious (as you might recall I’m agnostic and not sure what I believe) I did wear a bracelet she bought me before I started my first cycle of IVF- it has Saint Gerard on it and apparently he is the patron saint of expectant mother. I’m going to keep it on as I go.4

Dr. V did the transfer which is great, she is hilarious and I needed some laughter for the occasion! She asked me if I was ready to have a great and uneventful pregnancy and I said “I sure am!” While we waiting for the embryos we chatted and my mom recalled how myself and my brother were born and delivered, I heard about just a little bit about Dr. V’s children, and we chatted about weddings as I am second shooting a wedding this weekend and Dr. V asked me what I was up to over the weekend.

After the transfer was done I headed back to acupuncture, and then got some food and jetted to work. That’s it for now. Beta is August 8th. Hoping hoping hoping ❤




Getting closer.. FET just 2 days away

I need this to happen. Though, once it does, I’ll be in the dreaded TWW. Adam can’t come with me this time, so my mother is coming. I thought she might like to come along! A little Meme power can’t hurt. Hopefully she brings good luck. I followed a bunch of IVF blogs- reading other’s journeys is comforting. Adam doesn’t lose it like I do over this stuff. I am hoping beyond hope this is the cycle that works. I was looking into adoption stuff yesterday but I’m just not ready to give up yet naturally.

In non related IVF news, I need a damn vacation. I’m finishing up editing my last wedding before vacation. I go on vacation the third week of August.. so it will either be an early pregnancy awesome time vacation or a not pregnant again oh dear god I need to forget things for a while vacation. Nevertheless, I need a break from both jobs!!!!! I want to turn off my phone, NOT look at a computer, and just read, nap, swim, take photos, and kayak. Stuff like that.

I’m going to yoga after work tonight and I’m looking forward to my acupuncture session tomorrow.

That’s it for now.

FET Friday

My lining is at 7.1. Adam gave me my first shot around 8:15 pm, and I’m still taking my Estrace twice a day. I’m happy I don’t have to take it vaginally this time around, that’s a nice “break.” I started taking the antibiotics as well. I’m scheduling my acupuncture sessions for this week right after this. I’m going to yoga tomorrow night after work.

Today we went to an engagement party and there were so many kids and a couple babies. One of the couples there has a beautiful baby girl and the mom is already 4 months pregnant with her next. I wish it didn’t hurt me as much as it does to see this- because as I’ve stated- I’m happy for others, but goddamn does it hurt because you can’t have it yourself.

I guess that’s it for now.

Will you stab me in the ass?

Tonight I’m going to a show with my friend Jen, and it starts around the time I do my injections. Generally my mother in law does my injections as she lives right next door, my own mother, or my sister in laws in a pinch. Adam faints at the sight of blood so he doesn’t 134do them! I’ve done the PIO (or in my case, progesterone in ethyl oleate) in my thigh before but it was SO painful and I couldn’t walk right for a day. I’m lucky I have supportive people in my life!

Last night I went to bed and was having pinching in my uterus and what felt like my cervix. It almost took my breath away! I’m hoping that was my embryos making themselves comfortable in my lining. Today I am feeling slightly nauseous and very tired. I’m hoping these are all good signs! I almost tested this morning but I decided against it. I’m not sure how long I can hold out!

Last night I had acupuncture which was great, and as I thought, I fell into a deep sleep. I was dreaming and laughing in my dreams and woke myself up twice by groaning. Ooops. I also forgot I had a pin in the top of my head and went to fix my hair and OUCH. I didn’t notice until I got home (after stopping at the grocery store afterwards!) that I had a long trickle of blood down my face. Lordy! I ordered two more vials of my progesterone, I’m hoping I get to use the both of them.

So today will consist of me trying not to lose my mind, but tonight will be fun and dancey!

5dp5dt.. c’moooon embies!

Bruised hips, sore tits.

My boobs are SO sore. I had to do my injection on the same side twice in a row because my left hip has a huge knot in it. I tried to rub the knot out and it got a little smaller but now I’m all bruised up. My other hip isn’t as sore and has a tiny bruise. I’ve had pulling sensations in my womb today and mild cramping. Trying to keep my sanity the best I can.

I’m gonna relax so hard at acupuncture tonight.