It was a she. She was a girl.

I got the phone call about the genetic testing of the pregnancy tissue. Basically it was normal and they don’t know what caused the miscarriage, and there was no mother infiltration. “We’re still in limbo.” Dr. P says. I need additional testing. One of the doctors I worked for started talking to me while my doctor was talking on the phone so I was half in and half out of the conversation. I’m so frustrated about that. The baby was a girl. I’m devastated all over again. I had to do a patient immediately and the patient had an interpreter and another person in the room and I just wanted everyone to be quiet for a minute. After that the doctor came in and had 3 med students with him and everything was so loud, and the phone was ringing off the hook and no one was on the line and I just wanted to fucking SCREAM.

After a quick cry in the bathroom and a quick chat with Adam I’m back at my desk.

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6 thoughts on “It was a she. She was a girl.

  1. unplannedinfertility says:

    Please do something nice for yourself after work. I can only imagine how hard that phone call was, and you didn’t even get a few quiet minutes to process. Get through today and then get an ice cream, or a manicure, or go out instead of cooking tonight. Something. xoxo

    Liked by 2 people

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